How you can pull a Whitey Bulger
Commentary: How to fly under Big Brother’s nose
By Brett Arends, MarketWatch
BOSTON (MarketWatch) — How do you pull a Whitey Bulger? How do you drop off the grid like that for 16 years?
Whitey’s a monster — an accused killer and more. But when he finally got busted last week in an apartment a few blocks from the beach in Santa Monica, Calif., I have to confess I had a certain sneaking admiration.
Think about it. We have less privacy and freedom than any generation in history.
The government and big corporations know your every move. They know where you work, how much you own, how much you owe, where you go and what you buy. They know where you are, who you’re talking to and what you’re saying. They know what books and blogs you’re reading and what movies and TV you’re watching, and who your “friends” are. You are tracked by your cellphone, judged by your FICO score and monitored by your iPad. Your government ID number — known as your Social Security number — means that they can tie all these things together and trace them right back to you.
Yet here was Whitey Bulger — the most hunted American in history — living a comfortable, middle-class life just blocks from the beach, right under Big Brother’s big nose. And they didn’t have a clue.
Whatever you think of Whitey, that’s something.
Imagine trying to explain to Thomas Jefferson or James Madison how we live today, and how the federal government and big companies track our every move. Imagine trying to explain to Calvin Coolidge, for that matter.
Blame the Patriot Act. Blame credit cards and the Internet. Blame Apple Inc. AAPL +2.00% and Amazon.com Inc. AMZN +1.18% Blame FDR. But above all, blame us — for letting it happen.
So how can you pull a Whitey and drop off the grid?
1. You’re going to need cash — and lots of it. If you really want to vanish completely, you’re going to have to leave your Social Security number behind. Kelly Riddle, a private investigator who specializes in tracking people, says it is still possible to buy a new one on the black market. But it’s risky. You’re breaking the law, of course. And as Frank Ahearn, a former skip tracer, points out: If the number gets busted, so will you.
But without a Social Security number, you’re going to struggle to earn a good living. You won’t be able to open a bank account or get a credit card. So you’ll need to take as much cash with you as possible. If you want to live on $40,000 a year for the next 30 years, you’ll need $1.2 million.
Remember, if that money is sitting in a suitcase in the closet — Whitey had $800,000 when they found him — inflation will be eating away at its value. Even if inflation’s only 3% a year, your money is going to lose 60% of its value over 30 years.
2. Rent. You’re not getting a mortgage, and you’re probably not renting from a professional landlord. But Steve Rambam, a private investigator and a leading expert on finding people, says: No matter what city you go to, there are always plenty of people advertising on Craigslist willing to rent to you for cash.
3. Take precious metals and collectibles. You can’t open a brokerage account without providing your Social Security number, and that means you can’t invest in stocks and bonds.
But some hard assets are still totally private. Like bullion. Or rare coins. Or other collectibles — like rare baseball cards, Indian Head pennies or Penny Black stamps. You can buy them without telling Big Brother a thing. Mike Freedman at Euro Pacific Precious Metals notes that these transactions legally are akin to buying “a loaf of bread, or an antique.”
Alas, the complete fugitive will have to find a dealer with an old-fashioned store who can take cash. Thanks to money-laundering rules, you also can’t buy more than $10,000 at a time.
4. Move somewhere you don’t need a car. Since the attacks of Sept. 11, 2001, you need to provide your Social Security number to get a driver’s license. But you don’t need a license if you don’t drive. Think New York City. Or Boston, Chicago, Miami Beach, Washington, D.C. and a few other places.
5. Replace your electronics. They can track everything — your iPad, your iPhone, your PC. Each one has an identity and it can be followed online. Sell ’em all on Craigslist or eBay and buy new ones — with cash.
6. Create a new online identity. Using your brand-new computer and a public WiFi network, set up a completely new online identity for email, Amazon or Apple. You don’t have to give these up; you just have to open accounts under phony names. John Doe? Mickey bin Laden? Whitey Hussein? You make the call.
7. Axe your ‘social-networking’ sites. Goodbye, Facebook. So long, MySpace, LinkedIn LNKD +5.87% and the rest of them. Privacy? Are you kidding? You might as well walk down the street naked with your Social Security number tattooed on your behind.
If you are genuinely on the run, these social connections are one of the easiest ways for them to find you. When people get found, Steve Rambam says, it’s often because they tried staying in touch with some of their old pals. Even online it’s risky.
8. Get a Visa, MasterCard or American Express ‘gift’ card. This will let you shop online, where physical cash is useless, and is completely anonymous. Buy it in any drugstore and pay cash. Note: You need to buy a gift card, not one of those regular prepaid cards that you can reload with cash. Hard to believe, but even those prepaid cards demand your personal identity and Social Security number before you can use them.
9. Get a prepaid cellphone. Bargain carriers like Virgin and T-Mobile offer some cheap deals. And these, once again, are anonymous. You can even get them in a convenience store. Once again, pay cash. The wireless carrier can still track where the phone is used, but they don’t know who’s using it. Groucho Marx calling!
10. When you get out of town, go by bus. You can’t take a plane without providing a government-issued ID — OK, we get that. But you can’t even take Amtrak without doing so either. How ridiculous is that? The good news: Bus travelers are still free citizens in a free republic. Bob Schwarz at Peter Pan confirms that if you turn up at the station and pay cash, you don’t need ID. The same is true for any Chinatown bus too.
Brett Arends is a senior columnist for MarketWatch and a personal-finance columnist for the Wall Street Journal.